Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
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just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
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drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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