Cold hands, warm shart.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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