i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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