Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
mondays should just be called national damage control day
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
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