in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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