I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
