THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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