can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize