It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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