I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
