Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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