physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
