2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Floor bacon is actually really good
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
