She announced her abortion via fbk
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize