i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
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