i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
