I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
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