When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
