The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
