A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
he was CRYING into my vagina
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
