I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Come see our sink grown plant.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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