True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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