he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
should my penis look like a turkey
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
