Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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