And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
