Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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