He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
