I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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