Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
