I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
