he thought i was a dude.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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