careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
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he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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