She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
She told me I should be a condom model.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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