the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
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just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
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Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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