you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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