I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize