I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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