He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Sext me about skeletons
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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