Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
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