Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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