I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Randomize
