So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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