Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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