im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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