theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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