Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
God, I missed his penis.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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