Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
