she looked like the before picture.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
