wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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