If that was your dad, he is hot
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
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