Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
